The men have spoken, and they want to help women understand a few things. All they want to do is help us, poor creatures, so God bless their warm little hearts . . .
THE ADULT LEARNING CENTRE - Spring Classes for Women
NOTE: DUE TO THE COMPLEXITY AND DIFFICULTY LEVEL OF THEIR CONTENTS, CLASS SIZES WILL BE LIMITED TO 8 PARTICIPANTS, MAXIMUM
Class 1 Up In Winter, Down In Summer—How To Adjust A Thermostat
Step by Step, with Slide Presentation
Class 2 Which Takes More Energy – Putting The Toilet Seat Down, Or Bitching About It For 3 Hours?
Round Table Discussion
Class 3 Is It Possible To Drive Past Target Without Stopping?
Group Debate
Class 4 Fundamental Differences Between A Purse And A Suitcase
Pictures and Explanatory Graphics
Class 5 How To Ask Questions During Commercials And Be Quiet During The Football
Help Line Support and Support Groups
Class 6 How Kill A Spider And Go Downstairs When You Hear a Noise at Night
Open Forum
Class 7 I Was Wrong And He Was Right!
Real Life Testimonials
Class 8 How To Make Lists For Yourself And Not Other People
Writing Simulations
Class 9 Learning To Drive—How To Apply Brakes Without Throwing Passengers Through The Windscreen and How To Parallel Park In Fewer Than 20 Minutes Without An Insurance Claim
Video and Photographs
Class 10 How To Shop And Got To The Restroom By Yourself
Storyboard Presentation
Class 11 How To Do Things That Will Get You Dirty Or Cold or Wet
Shock Therapy
Class 12 How to Say What You Really Mean
Speech Therapy and Psychotherapy
Upon completion of any of the above courses, diplomas will be issued to the survivors.
_______________________________________________________
In response . . .
THE ADULT LEARNING CENTER – Spring Classes for Men
NOTE: DUE TO THE COMPLEXITY AND DIFFICULTY LEVEL OF THEIR CONTENTS, CLASS SIZES WILL BE LIMITED TO 8 PARTICIPANTS, MAXIMUM.
Class 1 How To Fill Up The Ice Cube Trays and The Dishwasher
Step by Step, with Slide Presentation
Class 2 The Toilet Paper Roll—Does It Change Itself?
Round Table Discussion
Class 3 Is It Possible To Urinate Using The Technique Of Lifting The Seat And Avoiding The Floor, Walls And Nearby Bathtub?
Group Practice
Class 4 Fundamental Differences Between The Laundry Hamper And The Floor
Pictures and Explanatory Graphics
Class 5 Dinner Dishes—Can They Levitate And Fly Into The Kitchen Sink?
Examples on Video
Class 6 Loss Of Identity—Losing The Remote To Your Significant Other
Help Line Support and Support Groups
Class 7 Learning How To Find Things—Starting With Looking In The Right Places And Not Turning The House Upside Down While Screaming
Open Forum
Class 8 How To Fight Cerebral Atrophy—Remembering Birthdays, Anniversaries And Other Important Dates And Calling When You’re Going To Be Late .
Cerebral Shock Therapy Sessions and Full Lobotomies Available
Class 9 Real Men Ask For Directions When Lost
Real Life Testimonials
Class10 Is It Genetically Impossible To Sit Quietly While She Parallel Parks?
Q&A
Class 11 Learning To Live—Basic Differences Between Mother And Wife
Online Classes and role-playing
Class 12 The Stove/Oven—What It Is And How It Is Used?
Live Demonstration
Upon completion of any of the above courses, diplomas will be issued to the survivors.
_______________________________________________________
N.B. This is not my own material, although I did change a few minor things. If you find the writer, please let me know so I can give credit where it’s due.









I signed up for more women’s classes than men’s. I’m not sure what that means…
Maddie and I need to take #3. Boy, do we have a story about that!
Sam needs #7. Not that I’m making a class list for him.